Home OpinionComrade Tichatonga 1 May(hem) anti-climax

1 May(hem) anti-climax

by commuadmin

I remember the years when rumours of strikes were rare, let alone actual strikes! Yes, I was still fresh from the bush then and my siblings who remained to pursue their education at the few schools which remained were now in their teaching jobs.

Most of my family were indeed committed teachers then. And it was prestigious to come from a family of teachers then. Our next door neighbours were teachers, both parents, ahhh zvaityisa, pamba pavo paive neimba yemaZen’e, gare gare pakaiswa mureza weTV and for a long time we couldn’t venture anywhere close to the house though we used to play house with their children tichiri vadiki nguva yaSmith.

No one really knew for certain if there was a TV in their house. Gare gare pakatengwa chiGenerator neFridge yeParaffin, haaaa ipapo ndipo patakazonoona TV manje. It was a small black and white SuperSonic contraption.

We would go there to watch Mvenge Mvenge whilst drinking Castle Golden Pilsner vana vachinwa MaKokora nemaEat One Now nemaVanilla Creams.

Teachers were well paid those years. Pamba apa paitizve nemota. Mazda B1600 yaive yakanyorwa kuti Kabot’s on the tailgate.

PaNext door and the story was the same, good life! Haaa those were the years when Zimbabwe partially delivered the promised land of milk and honey.

Nowadays the same teachers are being paid a pitiable pittance. Kana ari semaStudent teachers it’s even worse. It is as if our officers once they are elected into office suddenly develop selective dementia.

They forget the vital role the teachers play in nation building. They forget how they got there. They forget the teacher who stands in loco parentis – in the position of the parent at school, where our children spend most of their childhood. Deny it as we may, they are an integral and all too important part of the moral, mental and economic health of our nation to treat them like nonentities zvatiri kuvaita izvi.

But then the powers that want to have us believe they can fix the country from the top. That the policies they manufacture after being cloistered in Shake Shake Building for hours on end sipping on whiskey will somehow transform the country that has for long been standing on a shaky foundation!? Haaaa hey, mbuya vangu Moyo iweeee. Hakuna imba inovakwa kubva mudenga Scarfmore iwe musoro bhangu!

Ohh I always shoot from the hip; memories of war. Salutations! After a week investigating issues happening in the corridors of power Comrade Tichatonga will be wanting to belt out all before his small memory crushes with facts overload.

Greetings and salutations to you dear comrades, this is your one and trusted O’vet who witnessed the tribabilas incident; muera nhema who when he lies his teeth decay. The only academic credential I have is speaking truth to power.

So, it was Workers Day yesterday. Haaaa, I wonder what our workers in Zimbabwe must be thinking now!? Or do they even think of the day anymore, and its supposed significance? It used to be a public holiday but do we even still have holidays in this country? When you know that now even taking a toilet break means missing that dollar for the journey back to our Western suburbs. The worker is now a doormat for the influential.

I once saw two men offloading a trailer of 10 000 bricks for $10 in Harare. Ko wodiiko uchida kurarama nekuraramisa? The sad part is that the same Rural Party bigwigs, the authors and Guardians of this rot, will look at you scornfully and suggest you start some money generating project. Zvakaoma. With money from where – Tichatonga would really love to know!

So now we have a situation where the only work available is of course in politics, a church or street vending or obviously stoically accepting the change from a government job – if they are still worthy being called jobs. Kurima kunoda capital, apa tose hatikwanise kuve makorokoza. Haaa manje so!? Bakhithi!

I have just finished reading Scarfmore’s message to the nation on Worker’s Day. Shuwa musoro uya wakakurira pasina. The man was ranting and raving about transformation of the economy and, that ‘while we are industrialising….’ blah blah blah ad nauseum. What industrialisation is the munt talking about?

Who doesn’t remember Gweru and Kwekwe being industrial hubs not more than 20 years ago? Who doesn’t remember the 24-hour operations at ZimAlloys, ZimGlass, ZimCast, Kariba Batteries, Zisco Steel, to name but a few?

Now we are some years into the Second Republic (whatever the hell that means) and things are getting worse, – and despite what the priests of Baal say, the worker bears the brunt of it all.

Ndiyani uya zviya wekuti we are going to create hamenowo how many jobs? Yahhh, Psychology Maziwisa! So Street Vending jobs are the ones aitaurwa from Shake Shake Building?

Nxa, varume Ava nevakadzi ava vari kuda kujairira vanhu shuwa…and can someone please tell me where this Psychotic clown Psychology is ndimbomupa mbama!? (people grow into their names Psycho!!!!)

Ko Mutodi aripi nhai veduwe? Haaa zvatinoitirwa neRural Party iyi!? Inopedza Energy shuwa.

Oh, and me thinks the Worker’s Day in Zimbabwe should now aptly be exclusively for the Rural Party officials, MDC Mwonzwora and MDC Alliance and of course a few fortunate rural folks who still have a few cattle to till the land with.

Ndivo voga vanganzi vane mabasa ava. The rest of us haaaa kungoita gudza dungwe shuwazve. Sema Civil servants ahh, I salute them for their stoicism….and maybe I will have to engage the services if a certain Mbuya vangu who is a Social Scientist, vambonditsanangurirawo a certain phenomenon that I am observing in Zimbabwe.

The government continuously threatens the workers in then public service with expulsion from the service should they take to industrial action to voice out their concerns, yet they always somehow stay on even with a meagre salary.

What makes us as a people so pliant? Our public service so malleable to the whims and threats of the powers that be even in the face of insurmountable odds?

Most teachers teach at schools they can’t afford to send their own children to!? What is that? Cde Tichatonga is vexed.

I am getting to that point where I feel those who work in cohorts with the ferret force would accuse me of yep-yep. Yes, like I always say, speaking your thoughts is a crime in Zimbabwe when it’s however permissible in our capital city South Africa kkk. If you know you know. Yes, through the Patriotic Bill they are officially planning to criminalise yep-yep kkk.

I can’t however go ndisati ndambovhunza zvekumusha kwedu kuMidlands kwatinotongera nyika. Am told that City of Gweru Mayor who is also Urban Councils Association of Zimbabwe Chair and also Chairs chimwewo chiproject chakatangwa nayellow bonono Auxy scooped an award to add to his many titles. My question however is with how the social spaces have been criticising him, how has he gotten merit. Asi vanomunyepera kani?

Iyo Gweru City Park kuita kutsvaira mtawundi kkk mashura ajojina chaiwo. So, all those cars that used to afford parking fees now can’t afford such suddenly kkk

Today I live you with a special dedication, Mushandi NdiMambo, from wedu mushakabvu wezhira System Tazvida.

Till next time folks! Better ndinange kundari nenyama yemusoro wemombe yakagombegwa kwaMharuro kwaMbuya MaFidhe.

Aluta Continuation MaComrades.

Adios Amigos.

Tichatonga, Out!

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