Home OpinionComrade Tichatonga Zimbabwe: A Tale of two countries

Zimbabwe: A Tale of two countries

by commuadmin

Warm regards to you folks from the Harare Railway Station. Cde Tichatonga hopes you had a pleasant week on the whole, despite our new normal: – that we have to scrounge around to make it to the next meal.

Haaa zvakaoma, and do the gents and ladies in the high echelons of power care? Noooo, ukabvunza unogona kusungwa nekurohwa, then some big government clown will appear on DeadBC and, using big swelling words, defending their actions. Chete hanzi kana uri muZimbabwe, tanha dzaunosvikira!

Nauseating really!

Ko chaizvo chaizvo kuMbare hanzi zvaita sei futi? This is an issue of lives and livelihoods in such a delicate time of our nation’s history. If the ‘Murambatsvina’ we witnessed yesterday in Mbare is Covid related, maybe there is some reasoning there (reasoning and this Rural Party seem, at the very least, eternal strangers or even sworn enemies at ‘best’ – ndiGweru naKitchen, Bhuru  Shanga naIfa Mukono kkkk.

Cde Tichatonga is of the humble opinion that maAnswer ekutanga anofanira kuwanikwa patsanangudzo dzekuti paCovidgate mari dzaifamba sei uye kuti Scarfmore nemhuri yake neshamwari dzake vakaisepi mari zhinji kudaro, pane kunetsanana nevanotengesa huni neTsunga kuMbare. Tofa nechipi manje nhai Dr Scarfmore? Furuhwenza iyi kana nzara? Ohhh kana kuti zvamunofunga muShake Shake yenyu nanaKAmbero Mohadi?

Ohh I always shoot from the hip; memories of war. Salutations! After a week investigating issues happening in the corridors of power Comrade Tichatonga will be wanting to belt out all before his small memory crushes with facts overload.

Greetings and salutations to you dear comrades, this is your one and trusted O’vet who witnessed the tribabilas incident; muera nhema who when he lies his teeth decay. The only academic credential I have is speaking truth to power.

Condolences folks on the passing on one great Founding Father of African Liberation, Dr Kenneth Kaunda. I remember, though I never personally met him, how he helped us during my stay in Lusaka and my fellow cadres, we set up camp in Lusaka to plan and strategize from there. Go well KK. Rest in Power Baba! You tried to get a team to really detail what happened to Hebert Chitepo paye. Thank you.

First to depart the world however was Fr Emmanuel Rebeiro, a great man and an oasis of humbleness. This man helped many escape the guillotine back in the liberation struggle which also makes him a liberation war hero. One who fought with us from the front kwete vaya vaive kurear asi nokungwara vozviti mawar vet nhasi. Zvimwe muti munotamba vakomana! Rest easy my guy!

I was invited to join a Zimbabwean delegation to go to Zambia for KK’s burial but I declined opting to use iwn transport. Vanozotida pakuridza mhere but time we say war vets are suffering havatinzwi nxaaa. Kambero Mohadi is the organising man on this one, and ummmn, ndinotyira munhukadzi wese angangove in a 10 kilometre radius of this cassanova. So that’s why ndiri paHarare Railway Station, but to my disappointment, hanzi hakuchina chitima chingandisvitsa Zambia.  Ahhhh chiiko chakaitika kunyika yedu?

May someone please tell me kuti team rekuHigh Court riri kutiiko nenhau yaThief Injustice V11? Haaa zvakaoma shuwa. Saka truly Judicial Capture is going on in broad daylight Nana Scarfmore naZifambi Zifambi wake?

This is tragic, to say the least.

So now with the Budget surplus that Munyarari Ncube often speaks about, I am sure the Covid situation will be handled much better nanaGuvheya neMaSkilled Rebhara ake handiti? Iripozve Mari muEconomy yedu iyi, handiti ndizvo?

Nxa Tinyareiwo vanhu imi. Maghirazi amunopfeka ndeekuonei chaizvo? Chokwadi this country is a tale of two realities. The realities we see, isusu vana Tichatonga Ushemadzoro, nana Nyaradzo Povho- then of course there is a Zimbabwe which is doing so well it’s actually recording surpluses inongoonekwa naIdhii naMunyarari naPanonetsa, – whilst everyone else is a vendor; pensions are a joke; civil servants can’t afford to send their own children to the schools they teach at; or hospitals they work at.

This is tragic.

Ahhh ndisati ndakanganwa, ndakaona mupikicha waMarvelous Nakamba naIdhii musi uno. I have never really taken an interest to football ever since the days dzaana Moses Chunga, Peter Ndlovu nekedu Max Makanza iya Dream Team yaFabisch iya, so Marvelous has fanned into flame the dying embers of that erstwhile passion. Sometimes ndinotenga chiSuper ndonwa very tiny sips kusvika 2 hours dzapera Aston Villa ichitamba. It’s usually a big yawn but kana kedu Nakamba kachitamba haaaa I suffer through the 2 hours.

Now, I just want to ask what the young man had swallowed to be seen standing next to that beScarfed man!? Anyway, ko ndiye adii? Tomboti saBaba haunga arambi nokuti va*ura pavanhu. Also, thumbs up to the charity work in line but I maintain, mind your company because tichakarokukuona wakutiwo tswibidi kkk.

Ndakanzwa guhwa rekuti chedu Douggie Mubvaruri Mwonzora had a meeting ‘behind closed doors’ with Scarfmore to decide on the holding or rather, suspension of by elections. Hahahaha, ahhh yas, zvakaoma vakomana. Obvious Mwonzvora haangambomadi, unless pauya Command V11 and Command Voting, and Command Ballot boxes, havalume vaDouggie.

Chete handiti tose taakuziva zvedu kuti zvose zvafungwa neTeam Rural Party will be made legal, by hook and crook!? So haaaa imbozamai…but the winds of change are surely blowing now.

I am getting to that point where I feel those who work in cohorts with the ferret force would accuse me of yep-yep. Yes, like I always say, speaking your thoughts is a crime in Zimbabwe when it’s however permissible in our capital city South Africa kkk. If you know you know. Yes, through the Patriotic Bill they are officially planning to criminalise yep-yep kkk.

Asi before I go Comrades, tell me kuti iyi inotongwa sei. Kwedu kuMidlands kwatinotongera nyika, City of Gweru is being accused of misusing funds but vis-à-vis, development is notable compared to other cities…how can then the accusations brough to clarity so that development continues in harmony.

Also, can we say the council is failing to be implementing unmatched developmental projects against hordes of accusations mainly coming from resident associations in the City? Yakutoda Mai Chisamba iyi kkk!

Anyway, am looking for a well wisher anonditengerawo chibazooker ndimbonzwawo kaSulu kanetsa aka. Hanzi, makarima nechisi, makabvisa Mambo muna Mbudzi… Zvokwadi ndinganonakidza vamwe vangu ndasvika kudoro kwana Mhazi uko nekuti gwendo gweLusaka gwagugwa ugwu.

Aluta Continuation MaComrades.

Adios Amigos.

Tichatonga, Out!

 

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